So, apparently we condone violence. Super.

My nemesis strikes again. This was a few years ago. This time, he wanted to go on one of our computers. We’re lucky in that we have four computers in our classroom, but unlucky in the fact that everyone always wants to use them at the same time. Since all of the computers were taken, he made the executive decision that he would FLICK a girl on the back of the neck until she let him have her computer. Yes, I said FLICK.

This girlfriend was not having it. She was smart though. She knew that if she abandoned her computer to tell on this kid, he would promptly steal her seat. So, she asked a friend to come tell me. (Sidenote: I was on my way over anyway…my classroom isn’t that large and chaotic that I missed physical violence occurring.)

So, I tell this young fellow that he is now putting his hand on a peer and endangering the welfare of others and that he needs to go to the main office. I would write a referral for it later, but for now, he could not participate in our classroom lessons. He refused. Duh. I knew he would. So I called the main office and asked them to send someone down to retrieve our little troublemaker.

Around this time, I realize that it is soooo totally Social Studies time and that we need to clean up from Guided Reading. My fabulous fourth graders were trained by yours truly, so this whole process takes about 30 seconds, and we’re back at our desks, ready to be enlightened about the vivacious Vikings! (Kind of an appropriate topic for the day, I suppose.)

I’m just starting out a totally captivating lesson about longships when the assistant principal, who should be known as Edna from The Incredibles because she looks EXACTLY like that little cartoon seemstress, walks in.

“You need to come with me.”

“No. You can’t touch me. I know my rights.”

“You need to come with me. Let’s go.”

“No.”

“Well…he looks like he’s not really a disturbance anymore. How about he stays in the room?”

My. Jaw. Dropped.

As a first year teacher in this district, I wasn’t about to get into it with an administrator in front of my entire class. But, come on! The kiddo laid his hands on another student, was blatantly disrespectful, and nada? Cool. I had better brace myself for more of this, because it was sooooo coming. Can you believe this?